The quality that supports, enhances, nurtures and encourages all life in the universe can be nothing but LOVE. Creativity and kindness can exist only in an environment of love have you ever wondered why this warm fuzzy feeling can make you feel on top of the world? It is because love provides security, harmony and an environment of well being. All of us crave for that feeling in our life which is our true nature.
LOVE is the third face of intention.When you do what you do not love , you experience yourself to be out of alignment with the field of intention and it attracts dissatisfaction. However when you love what you do and do what you love, life is a blessing.
In the meditation of MCKS Twin Hearts ,the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi there is a beautiful line “Where there is hatred let me sow love” Love is a powerful high vibration/energy that can dissolve all lower emotions anger, hatred, jealousy. Just like a single candle can absorb the darkness of a room. Love is the most powerful and still the most unknown energy in the world,
Exercise: Look in the mirror , smile at this person and say I LOVE YOU straight in the eyes. Say this till the warm fuzzy feeling sinks in this is the person who needs your love the most.
“Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love. And think not you can direct the course of love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.”
– The Prophet Kahlil Gibran
Love is the most amazing human emotion and the most misinterpreted one as well . After a decade of falling in love and being married and hearing and sorting out marriages and love stories of friends my idea of love has evolved too. I feel , possessiveness, sacrificing, worrying, over protectiveness, and expecting others to change is not love. As parents taking decision on kids behalf in the name of “I care and I know your good better” is not love. Deciding a child’s career or the right partner or even friends and not allowing the child to try his own will is not love. Forcing a child to compete , whether it is by saying see your friend eats much faster than you or he gets better grades is definitely not love.
Every time someone does anything for us we label it as LOVE and when people do not fit in that label anymore we say they do not LOVE us. So What is actually LOVE? A new born child is a perfect example of what LOVE is ;it is just being the authentic self, no conditions attached. Whether he/she cries, gets cranky or has forced you into sleepless nights. The only thing you can do about it is enjoy its BEING , you still feed it, change its nappy and try to put it to sleep.And a smile on the toddler just makes your heart GROW. As parents most of our preconceived notions of love change so the equation of give and take just changes. We do not seek to change our baby but rather start appreciating the blessing the beauty it already is.
When I speak to couples going through relationship issues during counselling sessions the whole conversation revolves around ‘I thought he/she would change and adjust as per my needs, as per my family needs, she will sacrifice, compromise… Oh I married just because I thought he/she will grow up, be more responsible, work on her self’ etc etc etc….. there is a list of HOW I WISH ….. and that is the end of the relationship 🙂
During healing sessions projecting lots of love and affection towards the patient makes healing quicker. Sometimes I hear comments like no one has cared for me the way you do and I find it really sad to see that love is rare and may want to label through a relationship/friendship etc. There are no different kinds of LOVE believe me there is nothing like a child’s love, a mother’s love, god’s love , healer’s love .. 😛 LOVE is just LOVE. We just experience the depth of love being in all different roles .Love is tenderness of mother’s care, love is boyfriend’s hug, love is when a father hold her child’s hand while crossing the road, love is in mom’s food, friend’s care, silence after a kiss 🙂
If you are unable to find a deep intimate relationship in your life the reason is not because you are unable to find LOVE but your own distorted understanding of Love. Love is about the intimacy two individuals share from a space of total comfort. Where you allow the person to see through you; you do not force the person to see you the way you project but much more deep. So the elementary knowledge of love that we see in movies, in fairy tales does not work in real life real intimate love is more like a Ph D 😉
Love is not about idealizing the projected image of a partner or our own opinion and picture of them instead it is about going deep and exploring the real person he/she is and expressing appreciation and gratitude for this being. There is no person on this planet who is not worthy of love as we all are made in that essence.
As Marianne Williamson says” It is’nt the absence of people in our life that causes pain, but rather what we do with them when they’re there.”
So when we get a loving girlfriend , we forget our parents, when we get a beautiful wife we forget our friends , when we get women to have fun outside marriage we forget our wife……….so in reality we are never able to nourish any relationship and in the end we are ALONE.
You know why a search for love is endless?? As the love we seek is always there within us. So the day you have understood love, love will find you no matter where you are. Love can be beautifully understood from nature.
“And still, after all this time, the Sun has never said to the Earth, “You owe me.” Look what happens with love like that. It lights up the sky. – Rumi (Hafiz)
Great romantic relationships are based on intimacy and appreciation and by helping them access their highest . The fairy tale called “The Frog Prince” reveals a deep psychological connection between our attitudes towards people and their capacity for transformation. In the story, a princess kisses a frog and he becomes a prince. What this signifies is the miraculous power of love to create a context in which people naturally blossom into their highest potential. Neither nagging to get people to change, criticizing or fixing can do that.
You can only understand people in life if you can love them. “What is not Loved is not Understood” We hold our self separate and wait people to earn our love. But people deserve our love for what they were created to be and that is their Authentic Self. As long as we wait for them to be anything better, we will constantly be disappointed.
When we choose to approve and give pure love to people , the miracle kicks both ways – This is the key – Love Sargam
When I See YOUR FACE IS NOT A THING I WILL CHANGE BECAUSE GIRL YOU ARE AMAZING JUST THE WAY YOU ARE – Bruno Mars
Our Outer World is a reflection of our inner world; when we meditate or dive deep within we connect with the universe within. This helps us to realize the change that we seek in others in order to feel happy, loved and cared in life is only possible if we our self project these emotions towards us.
People around us are like mirrors they just reflect our inner feelings. Mindfulness , self love and meditations are beautiful tools to facilitate our inner connection.So if you really want the world outside to change then just move on to higher frequencies of love/joy/gratitude/appreciation.
Here is a video to help raise your vibrations 🙂
You are a luminous star dust ; let your light shine 🙂
Lots of Love Sargam!
10 fantastic quotes to help Raise Your Vibrations 🙂
1. “Drop the idea of becoming someone, because you are already a masterpiece. You cannot be improved. You have only to come to it, to know it, to realize it.” ―Osho
2. “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”―Wayne W. Dyer
3. “Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure.” ―Paulo Coelho
4. “You must find the place inside yourself where nothing is impossible.” —Deepak Chopra
5. “Sometimes in order to be happy in the present moment you have to be willing to give up all hope for a better past.” ―Robert Holden
6. “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ―Rumi
7. “What I know is that if you do work that you love, and the work fulfills you, the rest will come.”―Oprah Winfrey
“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.” — Rumi
Being born under the sun sign Pisces I love to escape from people and situations that are stressful into my own safe zone. This is an area I am constantly working with full awareness as even if I escape for a week or two or even for months once I am back I see more reasons to escape again 🙂
Most of us feel the same way even while counselling sessions I have discovered the problems are usually a blame on the external situations and people in our life. But in truth it is an escape from self , we are constantly running from situations and people which reflect our own inner self and as we constantly keep trying to change things outside and fail we are not able to change the situations/circumstances in our life.
In our close relationships we see the same situation, if a partner has a poor self image he/she will want others to help improve his/her self image. This leads to situations where he will want constant attention, respect and love and if the due attention is not given it will lead to rejection, sorrow and regret. The problem is most of us do not love our self and expect others to take charge of our happiness the truth is that all of us our struggling with our own self .
The escape from others is in truth an escape from self the other person is just a mirror he/she has nothing to do with their love/care/affection towards us they merely reflect our own feelings.
There is nothing that can upset you except yourself, No one can give you anything that you do not take. Mostly it is your own nature that you cannot handle and you expect others to take care of which may not always be possible and you will end up feeling rejected.
Most of us need to cultivate love, compassion,faith and a deep respect for our own inner being once this relationship with self is established everything outside will change. As I sit writing this article I feel so much at ease to know I need to go nowhere to make a change to my life ; these are my own inner veils that need to fall to let go of my own fears.
Here is a beautiful song by Jessica Simpson I belong to Me 🙂
“The minute I heard my first love story,I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere.They’re in each other all along.” ― Rumi, The Illuminated Rumi
Relationships are getting challenging in recent times, there is a constant struggle between partners as to who is the BOSS 🙂 With women taking up power positions and men losing the role as providers in a family there are obvious insecurities in relationships. A midst all this people still want to have loving and nurturing relationships as love is the food we all crave for.
Two people can be in a relationship only if they are a vibrational match to each other. You attract people into your life who mirror what you give. In other words, what you vibrate, is what comes back to you – and there is no vibration higher than LOVE.
What ever we want in love it can only come to you if you start giving it without conditions. Most of the people want their relationships to run one way. So we find either of the couple only giving or only receiving and then the relationships reaches a crisis where the one who is only giving has no more left to give and the other who is receiving can no more receive.
Also a very salient feature in love is “YOU CANNOT GIVE WHAT YOU DO NOT HAVE” it also applies materialistically 🙂 So the number one thing is to keep your love tank full by first loving yourself and accept yourself unconditionally. No one in the world can make you feel worthy if you yourself reject yourself.
Love IS or it IS’NT there is nothing like I loved you a year back, but not now …. if it is so the case then it was never LOVE 🙂
Most of the us hurt ourselves time and again to gain love and empathy or to test our loved ones and finally, get hurt as the response is not what we expect. We have a hard time accepting ourselves and we continue tp tax our partners for not filling the gap.
Change is inevitable but no one can change the other person, LOVE IS ABOUT ACCEPTANCE OF GOOD BAD and UGLY and being non judgmental. Security in love is when there is no I or YOU it is WE, the insecurity is only when there is EGO.
“Be Love in all ways, show love for yourself , respect yourself , practice self freedom, practice self trust and sincerity for your own self and then only then you can be LOVE”
It’s a story of hope. For twenty years, The 5 Love Languages has been improving marriages… one language at a time
Sargam Mishra 